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(00000) A friend asked to borrow a pair of jeans. Without hesitation I said yes, forgetting that the ones she requested I had been free-balling in for 3 days. Before I could say anything she had them on. I never told her. Allnewlow.

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October 5, 2009 at 8:48 pm by Anonymous in - Friends [+]

(98132) During spring break I was hooking up with a girl. As I started to go downtown, I noticed a white string peaking out. Eager to get laid, I took her tampon out, with my teeth. Allnewlow.

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October 5, 2009 at 8:40 pm by Anonymous in - Sex [+]

(07010) I had the cops show up at my ex-boyfriend's house after his new girlfriend moved in to feign an anonymous domestic disturbance. Allnewlow.

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October 5, 2009 at 8:37 pm by Anonymous in - Miscellaneous [+]

(92780) I just tasted my own semen to see what it was like. Allnewlow.

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October 4, 2009 at 5:51 pm by Anonymous in - Miscellaneous [+]

(10108) I just charged my friend $50 to let this girl come over to bang him because I'm poor. I have turned my room into a whore house. Allnewlow.

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October 4, 2009 at 5:50 pm by Anonymous in - Money [+]

(95771) I secretly wished that I could have been one of the little kids Michael Jackson allegedly molested just to play in Neverland. Allnewlow.

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October 4, 2009 at 5:49 pm by Anonymous in - Love [+]

(95926) One time, I washed my underwear in the kitchen sink with Palmolive because my booty call was coming over and I didn't have anything clean to wear. Allnewlow.

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October 4, 2009 at 5:47 pm by Anonymous in - Miscellaneous [+]

(90210) Last night, I had to sleep at the foot of my bed with my legs hanging off because the night before, the girl I brought home pissed all over my mattress. Allnewlow.

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October 3, 2009 at 7:18 pm by Anonymous in - Sex [+]

(98228) I partied pretty hard the night before an early shift at work. Showing up extremely hungover and nauseous I spent the majority of the morning puking in the bathroom. Trying to cover, I told my supervisor I was pregnant and had morning sickness. Allnewlow.

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October 3, 2009 at 1:52 am by Anonymous in - Work [+]

(95926) During my junior year of college I had a series of one night stands. One morning before doing the walk of shame I scoped out my hook-up's fridge. On my way out I swiped his bag of taco bell for lunch later and his house key as a souvenir. Allnewlow.

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October 3, 2009 at 1:45 am by Anonymous in - Sex [+]

(94537) I drunk-dialed my boyfriend after a few too many tequila shots to let him know I just pooped. I asked him if he could come to the bar to help me wipe my ass because I wanted to "get frisky with him and needed a clean butthole." Allnewlow.

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October 3, 2009 at 1:40 am by Anonymous in - Love [+]

(94526) Last night I spent my evening using Photoshop to impose my fictitious "boyfriend" in pictures because I told my mom I had been dating someone for the past 4 months. Allnewlow.

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October 3, 2009 at 1:18 am by Anonymous in - Miscellaneous [+]

(12206) My boyfriend I had just gotten back together after taking a "break." During that time I ended up hooking up with my neighbor who happened to have an affinity for sex toys, specifically cock rings. It was left in my nightstand and when my BF found it, rather than reveal that I slept with someone else, I told him I had purchased it for him...we used it that night. Allnewlow.

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October 3, 2009 at 1:09 am by Anonymous in - Love [+]

(59620) I was helping my friend move out of his apartment when I noticed one of the open boxes I was carrying was full of porn DVDs. Out of curiosity I snooped and ended up uncovering some nude pictures of his ex-girlfriend. I took one of them and still have it to this day. Allnewlow.

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October 3, 2009 at 1:07 am by abowman in - Friends [+]

(95771) When I was a child, I tried to make out with my dad and then cried when he rejected me by throwing me across the room. Allnewlow.

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October 2, 2009 at 10:22 pm by Anonymous in - Love [+]

(00000) A guest speaker came to talk to my Health class about having AIDS. While she was there I was thinking of a funny story and I started busting up laughing as she was crying about giving her unborn son HIV. Allnewlow.

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October 2, 2009 at 12:36 am by Anonymous in - Food [+]

(93308) During a drunken episode I used my sister's electric toothbrush as a vibrator and never replaced it with a new toothbrush head. Allnewlow.

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October 1, 2009 at 5:45 pm by Anonymous in - Miscellaneous [+]

(78516) I had a friend coming to visit from out of town. Not having time to do laundry, I resorted to hanging dirty towels in the bathroom for her to use. Allnewlow.

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October 1, 2009 at 5:33 pm by dwntwncharlie in - Friends [+]

(06190) After a nasty fight with my roommate I plotted revenge. When she went to bed I went and hawked a loogie in her coffee creamer and watched her the next morning as she poured it in her coffee. Allnewlow.

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October 1, 2009 at 5:28 pm by Anonymous in - Friends [+]

(85006) One time while walking home drunk with my friend, we found an unlocked church. After playing the drums at 3:00am as bad as we could, we walked out with a wheelchair so he could push me home. We took a wheelchair from a church. Allnewlow.

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September 30, 2009 at 11:12 pm by theunderstudy in - Friends [+]

(02103) My roommate and I thought we were starving college students. We found a local food cupboard and decided to give it a try. After filling out paperwork at the church, we were told to come back in about an hour to pick up our "one time only, emergency" food basket. While we were waiting, we went and ate at a pizza place. Allnewlow.

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September 30, 2009 at 11:10 pm by misterfister in - Miscellaneous [+]

(58507) Sharing a house with 5 girls usually means the bathroom is occupied. Needing to pee really bad and having no access to a toilet, I resorted to popping a squat in my cat's litter box. I even buried it. Allnewlow.

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September 30, 2009 at 10:58 pm by sourpunch in - Miscellaneous [+]

(66118) I took my girlfriend out for dinner one night for a nice meal. It was our waitress's first night on the job. When she brought us the bill I noticed we were severely undercharged (by at least $60). Rather than letting her or my girl know, I paid the $30ish dollar tab and left. Allnewlow.

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September 30, 2009 at 10:47 pm by Anonymous in - Money [+]

(94706) After a night of partying my friend and I decided to grab some food. Having no credit card or cash available and being a small chested girl, I pulled down my friends shirt to flash her well-endowed chest to the pizza boys so we could eat. Allnewlow.

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September 30, 2009 at 10:31 pm by Anonymous in - Money [+]

(48823) My financial aid was stalled. To make ends meet I was working as a busboy at a restaurant near campus. After a long shift, I was broke and starving. A table I was clearing had quite a bit of leftovers. I boxed them up and took them home to eat. Allnewlow.

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September 30, 2009 at 6:50 pm by Anonymous in - Work [+]

(95485) I had to take a #6 REAL bad, but there was no bathroom. I ran out into some bushes, let it all out, and then grabbed some leaves to wipe. I got the worst case of poison oak of my life and lied to my boss that I was out sick for a week. Allnewlow.

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September 29, 2009 at 10:40 pm by Anonymous in - Work [+]

(94123) I was masturbating in my room when my frat brother came barging in. I quickly climbed out the window onto the balcony to avoid getting caught in the act. My bro saw me, and slammed and locked the window, leaving me outside naked for hours. I jacked off and shot my load onto his car. Karma's a bitch. Allnewlow.

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September 29, 2009 at 10:33 pm by Anonymous in - Friends [+]

(94123) I got home from the bars and found a girl I had hooked up with before passed out in my bed. I tried waking her up, but she was out, so I took matters into my own hands. I grabbed something to clean my stuff. In the morning, she put her sweater on, and I pretended not to notice the stains all down the back of her sweater. Allnewlow.

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September 29, 2009 at 6:28 pm by Anonymous in - Sex [+]

(92887) I've been totally crushing on this guy and we've been texting back and forth. He finally called me as I was getting out of the shower and I ran across the room to take the call, not realizing that I had dropped my towel along the way. As I stood there naked in front of my roommates friends I realized he had accidentally pocket dialed me. Allnewlow.

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September 29, 2009 at 5:37 pm by Anonymous in - Miscellaneous [+]

(94107) So, I threw back a few too many, but I was determined not to let it ruin my sex life. I was hooking up with this girl, and got the spins. I powered through, but then while she was in the bathroom, I puked in her closet. I never told her. Allnewlow.

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September 29, 2009 at 4:04 pm by Anonymous in - Sex [+]

(77840) I told this chick I just washed my sheets, and she must've gotten her period on my sheets, but I'm pretty sure it was the chick I brought home the night before. Allnewlow.

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September 29, 2009 at 4:00 pm by Anonymous in - Sex [+]

(77840) I took a fat one for the team, so my buddy could hook up with the hot one on his birthday. Little did he know, she already sucked me off in the bathroom before he got with her. Allnewlow.

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September 29, 2009 at 3:58 pm by Anonymous in - Friends [+]

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We’ve all had it happen. All New Low was founded to pronounce those moments in which we find ourselves with compromised dignity due to intoxication of love, stupidity, or substance. Such situations have left many of us with a feeling of embarrassment, coupled with great regret, and a promise to ourselves (and to all of our friends) to forget our bad decisions. Rather than pretend we never make mistakes, All New Low allows us to embrace our misadventures and ultimately share in a good laugh, as we realize the adage, “We’ve all been there,” ALMOST always applies.